Meh

Welp. The semester’s winding down, and I’ve got 2 weeks left of instruction and then finals week, and then it’s done. Honestly, I won’t be sad to see the end of this, because it’s been a pretty ho-hum type of 16 weeks. Even as we’re getting to the end, I feel like I lack motivation to finish it out strong, which is a terrible state of mind. I’ve done absolutely nothing over the last two days, even with my classes continually adding to my plate. I know I need to get started on things, but that apathy’s been hitting me pretty hard. It doesn’t help that I ordered a new 27″ IPS monitor because it was cheap… so my laziness can now extend from my sitting in front of the comp watching shows/sports to my lying on the bed doing the same thing… and drift off to sleep. The daytime naps aren’t something I enjoy too much either, seeing as how naptime means that my nighttime sleep will be disrupted, more often than not.

I’m gonna venture a guess and say that I’ve just been unfortunate with what I’ve been dealt at pcc. On Wednesday, our physio class did a lab that only required 6 people to participate.. the other 14 or so of us just sat there for the 3 hour duration of the class.. and did absolutely nothing. Such a damn waste of time. We had impromptu speeches on Thursday, of which there were two requirements. Use a quote from a select bunch prepared by our instructor, and speak for 3 minutes. In our group of 4, two of the peeps barely spoke for 90 seconds, and I’m pretty sure one person didn’t even use the quote and/or bother to cite the source. I’d say these two events are a pretty good microcosm of the past 13 weeks I’ve had to endure.

I guess you could sorta see why I just can’t be bothered to do… almost anything as of late. But there’s two sides to this that’s fighting inside me. One is that, okay, life is boring, so let’s just meeeeh it through. But the other side tells me that I can’t use that as an external influence on me, especially when it’s so lacking. This other side tells me that my inspiration should be innate and come from within, because lying on my lazy ass all day long certainly doesn’t get me anywhere.

If I didn’t know my own age, and were reading this from an outsiders perspective, I could easily confuse this with the angsty posts I had in my teenage years. I’m pretty sure that’s nothing to be proud of.

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